35 Cursed Toys That Should’ve Been Stopped At The Concept Stage

Updated on December 22, 2025

I was doing last-minute holiday shopping and made the rookie mistake of wandering near the toy aisle without a plan. Five minutes later I was staring at something that looked like it escaped a fever dream, and I realized: cursed toys are real, they are among us, and they absolutely do not need batteries to haunt you.

December is when the weirdest stuff surfaces—gift guides, clearance bins, and those “who approved this?” inventions that feel like they were pitched at 2 a.m. after too much eggnog. If you love weird toys, nightmare fuel, and straight-up creepy dolls energy, this gallery is basically your seasonal jump scare.

35 Cursed Toys For When You Need A Laugh And A Flinch

You’ve already seen the Godzilla vs. Jesus playset, which is… a sentence I can’t believe I typed. That’s not a toy, that’s a theological cage match with tanks. I don’t know who it’s for, but I do know it’s not for “ages 4+.”

Then we get cursed toys like the duck with human legs in a bikini bottom, standing upright like it’s about to file a complaint. It has the confidence of a villain who knows you can’t prove anything. Add the plush grub with a human face and the “you are the mother” messaging, and suddenly I’m Googling how to bless a retail store.

The minimalist “LEG” toy is also incredible. One plastic man leg. That’s it. No context. No story. Just a single limb, like a side quest item you forgot to pick up in a game and now you’re stuck.

And the empty action figure package labeled “Absent Father” is so dark it practically has its own weather system. That’s the kind of cursed toys joke that makes you laugh, then immediately call your therapist, then laugh again because you’re coping.

The sickly McSupersized Ronald figures, the melting wax bear with bees, and the vintage red-eyed rabbit with sharp teeth all feel like they belong behind glass with a warning label. Toss in the jarred baby dolls and you’ve got the full creepy dolls experience: why are they pickled? Who asked for this?

If you want more “what am I looking at” content like these cursed toys, open 30 Weird Images That Feel Like Pranks, 32 Nightmare Fuel Finds From Online Shopping, and 24 Cursed Product Photos That Should Be Illegal.

Jake Parker writes like he’s calling plays on a cursed kickoff return: fast reads, big reactions, and no mercy for bad design choices.