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Tumblr After Dark: 25 Funny Tumblr posts from the best of the ridiculous that is Tumblr

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u lie down and its like (• ) just how it is ( •) and thats
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its 4am and i just woke up after having a dream where i made this post but idk whh i gave them burgers but tbh they look happy about it and sorry i know theres not 20 but thats what it said in my dream ok
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are you gonna pick those penne noodles out of the boiling water one by one like a man, or are you gonna use a strainer like some kind of democrat?
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"capitalism breeds innovation" was only ever true in the mid-2000s when cell phones kept getting more and more
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Who would you trust more? total stranger in a star trek shirt total stranger in a star wars shirt
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me and my brother: *explains how adhd affects us* our parents: that's not adhd, that's normal me and my brother:
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Feverishly calculating the body mass of your dragon species, spent 5 hours last night researching the origins of steel, losing sleep over horseshoes, 20 tabs open, should a cockatrice be warm-blooded?, will die if they don't immediately figure out when honeybees were first domesticated
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someone: coca cola can remove rust from metal imagine what its doing to your body me: pff getting rid of the rust idiot hmm... i've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where youre getting your facts from...
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we were all forced to read "classics" in school so reblog and put the one you actually ended up liking a lot and the one you can't
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The two E's in"Bee" might actually be silent
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looking at wikipedias list of obsolete jobs and dreaming of a better life Cigarette girl Garden hermit High Priestess of Athena Polias Lady's companion Ninja Priest hunter Professional mourning Runemaster Toad doctors Useful man
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i'd love you if and only if you were a worm. bitch forgot about my icon before making this post
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god i love reading about stupid drama in ancient greece. like there was an athlete named theagenes who was so good at every kind of athletic contest that when he died, one of his opponents would go to beat the sIt out of a statue of him out of spite, but then one day the statue fell on the guy and killed him so the greeks took the statue to court for murder, convicted it, and threw it into the sea actually i left out the best part of this story which is that a plague then struck and when people consulted the oracle at delphi she was like "well you've pissed of theagenes" so they had to go dig the statue back up out of the
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I had a dream last night that they made a new Bond movie, but they didn't say who was playing Bond. Throughout the movie you have no idea which character is really Bond, because he's undercover, duh. And every single character, no matter how minor, was played by somebody famous, so they could all conceivably be Bond. And at the end it turns out Bond was Leslie Jones.
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thinking about my optometrist who was treating my eye infection and said "if it hurts, you can rinse your eye with boiled water. look at me - look at me. i want you to understand that i mean water that has been boiled and has since cooled down. not boiling water. do you understand?" like i'm so grateful for this man ensuring that I wouldn't destroy my eyes by pouring boiling water in it, because it is an adequate assessment of my intelligence
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OUT OF THE CORNER OF MY Y EYE I JUST MISTOOK ANOTHER STUDENT FOR A TRASH CAN AND THREW MY TRASH AT HER THIS IS THE MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT OF MY LIFE but not as embarrassing as getting mistaken for a trashcan
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Me entering any museum: man I'm so excited to learn all the things Also me: GIFT SHOP GIFT SHOP GIFT SHOP There are two dragons inside of you. One hoards knowledge and the other hoards trinkets. They're both very excited when you bring them to a museum
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When your hair is wavy/curly sometimes there is a fine line between "messy romantic waves" and "evil witch who lives in the woods." When your hair is fine and straight there's a fine line between "sleek and elegant" and "weasel dipped in grease" When you're hair is thick there's a fine line between "gorgeous vibrant bounce" and "holy
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*moving expired potions from the shelf labeled Healing to the shelf labeled Poisons*
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the only bad thing about garlic is all the paperwork you have to do before you can even cut it up look at that layers and layers of bureaucratic bullshit OP I hope you realize how strongly you have impacted my life. I think about this every time I use garlic. EVERY TIME.
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The United States of America was founded over Hold on I gotta Google something 7 years ago
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new yorker who works at a burger place: welcome to da boiga joint new yorker who wants a burger: gimme a boiga new yorker who works at a burger place: one boiga comin up new yorker who cooks at the burger place: time ta cook a tasty boiga
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my friend told me that her boyfriend got her a super cool rock while they were on vacation together and you would not BELIEVE my disappointment when i realized she was talking about her engagement ring
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Posted by Roy R. About the author

Roy has been one of the internet's meme tastemakers for more than a decade. He and Phil started Thunder Dungeon in 2012 by posting the stuff they found funny, and it grew into viral photo and video creations, one of the largest meme community apps and one of the best sites for daily meme content. If you've spent any time online, you've probably laughed at one of his memes.

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