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31 Hilariously Unhinged Kid Stories and Wild Child Experiences

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I caught a seagull when I was 4 and decided to lick it to see what it tasted like, it was slightly salty / fishy and I got strep throat from it. Kids are weird!
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my mom got a call from my middle school: "you daughter was involved in a fight. She wasn't participating, but another student picked her up and used her as a weapon to injure another student. You may want to get her checked out at an urgent care just in case.
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In 2006 we were walking in a park and a squirrel came running down a tree, climbed up me leg and sat on my shoulder. People around me stepped backwards but a child around 5 said "oh he knows you!" I sat on my knees and talked with a child and a squirrel. It was magic
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1- When my daughter was 1.5, I received a panicked call from her preschool while I was at work, they thought she had put mulch in her mouth and were doing a finger sweep to get it out... only it wasn't mulch, it was a field mouse...
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The best incident report we got was the day our son and his buddy (in 1st grade) disassembled the water fountain. Our respond was to ask how two 6 year olds had been unsupervised long enough for that to happen. Zero response.
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My grandson went to the park with his nursery class (pre-school). Came back, sat on a mat and a mallard duckling calmly walked out of his trouser pocket! Ducks and geese are his friends!
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My wife's father was a game warden and he would make her and her siblings go out and wrestle pelicans to the ground so he could tag them. So I don't see what the big deal is here.
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When mine were still in brick & mortar they started doing indoor/outdoor shooter drills where they told the kids to scatter & hide as best they could. Both my kids (8&10) took off into the forest. They eventually returned & were quite pleased with the hike & missing school
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Legit call from Superintendent: "Let's start with... Do you know Lauren has a snake?" Didn't get much better after that
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I caught a bird as it was fluttering around me. Walked it to my mom and said, "hey you like birds." She yelled at me to let it go. To be fair, I was a teenager. When I caught a mouse in my hands last month, my friends flipped on me too. WHY CAN'T I CATCH ANIMAL FRANS
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My daughter poured some of my coffee in her water bottle and took it to school, later she started serving some of it to her classmates during lunch time, we got a call from principal that day... Edit: she was 5 years old...
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I bet my mom I could lure a male mallard duck in Burger King parking lot with a French fry and catch it. I did! That duck was mad! A few weeks later when we stopped at Burger King, there were signs not to feed the ducks. True story!! Auburn, Maine.
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I came home at age nine with a hedgehog and a half dead pigeon. On the same day. My Mother wasn't impressed. Don't suppose get points for that do i?
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This is amazing & I got a call once that my daughter was luring the chipmunks so she could pet them & got nipped by one
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one of the kids I went to highschool with perfected the capturing seagull strategy using a gated fence door and used to put them in his backpack and release them in class
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This takes me back to a student I had that taped a chunk of hair to an apology letter and another time got in trouble for trying to force kids to drink "mermaid potion".
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I got I trouble for catching frogs and toads on the school playground. Apparently, offering an amphibian friend to a screeching classmate is not considered good manners.
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Me: "How was school today?" My 7yo daughter: "Great! Graham was bitten by a mole during recess!"
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Not school related, but DH once took our twins to the park, (aged 4) one took off at a run to find a foxcub, talk to it telepathically and become queen of the animals- her words), while DH was chasing her, the other walked into the pond to play with the ducks. Both were fine btw.
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Reminds me of when I was a toddler and I ate a spider off the wall outside and my older sister thought I ate a flower so she told me to spit it out spat out two legs
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Not me taking home two grown a pigeons from my Jr. High school. Not my Dad showing up in his old beat up truck with a cat carrier to help me.
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My kid and his friend made an army of Hornets at his school. They stepped on one that was on an apple outside and I guess that angered a whole hoard of them. For the rest of the day kids couldn't go outside without getting attacked and stung so no gym classes could be held outside that day.
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Me: My kid: I'd like to take a paper bag and trick a raccoon to creep inside. Me: Why? My kid: To study it.
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I iust get calls to "discuss" with my child that hanging around sick bay will not get him sent home unless he is sick - he was going 4 to 5 times a day. He said he'd had enough of school for the day and it was the fastest way to get home.
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Our (mine+@Doc_Amma) then 2 y.o. used to shake hands with wild macaques. Their official statement: "It was onnee a baby monkey and my fend". We had NO problems, only asked them to wash their hands after "shaking hands" with wild animals and to NEVER feel wild animals.
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That time my daughter carried a lizard through 3 class periods to bring it home
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One summer when I was bouncing at a bar with an outdoor section I befriended a squirrel by giving it bar peanuts. It was plucking peanuts right out of my hand with its paws and sitting by my feet. Management ordered staff to chase it off the premises to prevent an incident.
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Legit call from the school: Principal: I just wanted to touch base with you. Your daughter was baiting seagulls into the playground with gummy worms and actually caught one; Like in her arms. It did bite her-not hard, but I needed to inform you that we filed an incident report
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My daughter, last week. Public park.
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Reminds me of the time a mom said 63, "Um, your son has... a possum" | looked over to see my 9 yo son holding a huge opossum by the tail. I yelled, "Stop carrying a dead opossum!" He replied, "but it's not dead!" Not the first, certainly not the last time with him.
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Nice. I got this email from my kid's teacher a few days ago. to me v Hello, Today in art class, the students went outside and were able to draw with chalk on the sidewalk. Matthew and another student decided to roll around in the chalk and not obey. Please speak with him about proper art behavior.
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