We have all had those moments where our brains just stop working and we say something so weird that we have to move to a new country. These awkward tweets are my entire life story. I once told a librarian I had to pee instead of paying my fine, and honestly, I am still recovering. From accidental dentist hugs to yelling at couples in the street, these social blunders are the reason I usually stay inside and eat pizza alone.

Awkward tweets

There is a universal pain in saying “you too” to a cashier at Target when they tell you to have a nice day. It is a verbal short-circuit that makes you want to melt into the floor. These relatable moments are the bread and butter of our second-hand cringe lifestyle. You look at a tweet about someone mistaking a coworker’s fist bump for an invisible microphone and you just have to close your eyes and scream. It is a public disaster of epic proportions. I have definitely been the person who asked to pet a muffin because I thought it was a hamster. Why does the brain do that? It is like it sees a round, fuzzy shape and just guesses “rodent” without checking the facts. Then you have the accidental dentist hug during the bib removal. That is a life-changing level of embarrassment. You can’t just go back there; you have to find a new dentist and probably a new city. We see the internal struggle of accidentally telling a stranger “I love you too” on a Bluetooth call and you realize that human interaction is just a series of accidental “I love yous” and mistaken identities. It is a beautiful, terrifying disaster that makes us all want to disappear into the nearest ball pit and never come out.

Intervening in a street fight just to yell “hug it out” and getting a dark reply is a top-tier social fail. These awkward tweets capture the exact moment that hope leaves the conversation. We laugh at the verbal slip-ups because if we didn’t, we would just be internally screaming forever. Whether you are swiping no on Tinder right in front of the guy or telling a customer to “hold me for a second,” you are part of the club. We are all just trying to navigate a world that requires way too much talking and not enough muffins that are actually hamsters.

If you are currently cringing at your own past mistakes, you should look at some social anxiety memes, introvert humor, or maybe some epic fail videos. There is plenty of company in the world of awkwardness. Just try to remember that most people are too busy worrying about their own fist-bump microphones to notice yours.