36 Dad Jokes You Will Be Slightly Disappointed in Yourself for Laughing At

Roy

2 years ago

Why do horses have low divorce rates? They have stable relationships.

You thought the last couple jokes you heard were bad? spoiler Well, this Fibonacci joke is worse than the last two you heard combined.

A police officer just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs are chasing people on bikes. That's ridiculous, because my dogs don't even own bikes.

What does Beethoven do in his grave? He decomposes

I changed all my passwords to 'Kenny' Now I have all Kenny Loggins

I bought a dozen bees, but they gave me 13. I love a free bee.

What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast.

I can't think of any boat puns Canoe?

My grandfather was terrible but then I had my first child. Then he became a great grandfather

My aunt stole my car I guess my car's anti-theft devices aren't very good

What happens when a lumberiack doesn't get his way? He throws a timber tantrum.

A colorblind friend insists that all apples are yellow I told him that was bananas

What's the name of a religious group that makes life harder on purpose? The DiffiCult

I told my Wife I was building a model of Mount Everest, she asked, "Is it to scale?". I replied, "No, it's to look at"

My math teacher said I was average. But that is just mean.

How much space should you give fungi? As mushroom as possible

I hate people who use physically impossible metaphors They make my blood boil

My optometrist tried a new therapy with me today and put ketchup in my eyes. Apparently Heinz sight is 20/20

I was so unpopular at school they used to call me "Batteries". I was never included in anything.

Man walks into an ancient Greek tailors with a pair of ripped trousers. Tailor says, "Euripides?" Man says, "Yeah. Eumenides?"

So, my dad asked me to name a country with no r in it. I said noway

From my 9 year old: Who is the king of all school supplies? The Ruler.

If a Lama with one Lis a holy man in Tibet... And a Llama with two L's is an adorable beast of burden... What's a three L Lama? A big fire in Boston.

I've been telling people about the benefits of eating dried grapes, You know, Raisin Awareness

What's the opposite of island? Isn't land

Before Turning the HeAT On Do you?. Have - - - see Your breath NO , heAT Nuded dressed

i'm never donating to anyone collecting money for a marathon again. they just take the money and run

Where does a horse go when it gets sick? To the horse-pital

Yesterday, I farted in the Apple Store and everyone got upset at me. It's not my fault they don't have Windows.

I asked my wife, "Do you know a three letter word for 'eggs'?" Her: It's ova. Me: Why? Is it because I'm terrible at crosswords?

What's the difference between a well dressed Man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.

When the inventor of the USB flash drive dies... They'll lower him into the casket, then pull him back up, flip him over, and lower him again.

I'm trying to make some extra dough by selling jokes for 5 cents each. It's a pun per nickel.

As a child, I was forced to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog.

My son wanted to know what it was like to be a parent so I woke him at 2am to tell him my sock came off

Roy

Roy R., Chief Meme Curator Roy founded Thunder Dungeon in 2012 and has since guided its growth into a 2.5 million‑strong community of meme enthusiasts. With over a decade of digital‑media experience and a nose for viral humor, Roy oversees content strategy, ensuring every post is both hilarious and high‑quality