38 of the Worst Resumes and Red Flags Hiring Managers Have Seen

Roy

2 years ago

Worst resumes ever

Get your cringe-proof goggles on as we unveil 38 resumes that redefine the art of 'career self-sabotage.' These bad boys aren't your typical lackluster resumes; they're more like a cavalcade of hilariously disastrous attempts at employment that make you wonder if the applicants were sleep-deprived or just trying to win a bet on who could craft the most absurd document. From fonts that seem stolen from a ransom note to job experiences that read like entries from someone's wild dream journal, these resumes aren't just the cherry on top of the cake of bad ideas, they're the whole rotten cake itself. They give hiring managers a good chuckle, but probably not a callback. People devour these posts faster than they ditch their Monday morning meetings because, let's face it, there's a strange joy in witnessing other people's employment fails, especially when you're stuck in the perpetual circus of the nine-to-five grind. Get ready for a rollercoaster ride of 'What were they thinking?' moments that'll make you clutch your own resume in desperation.

In those 38 resumes, it's like wandering through a gallery of job application nightmares where each exhibit manages to outdo the previous in sheer absurdity. Online, these worst resumes are a goldmine of laughter that's both hilarious and kind of sad – like watching a sitcom about a failing career. They generate more laughs than a stand-up comedian on a Friday night and serve as cautionary tales that make job seekers reconsider hitting "send" on that too-bold cover letter.

Worst resumes ever On a more lightweight tone than most of the other comments: I once received an application from a man in in 60s. Solid CV, lots of experience. In his covering letter he wrote "I'm applying because the Job Centre asked me to. Please note that I intend to retire in 6 months time". We had a good laugh, then sent him a very polite rejection letter and wished him a great retirement.
Worst resumes ever I used to do a lot of hiring. It's disheartening to read so many comments about immediately eliminating overqualified candidates. Not all overqual'ed are just filling time and looking to jump ship asap. Many want to try something new, something less demanding, something that helps move them into a different role or field. It's a serious mistake to eliminate overqualified candidates without even talking with them.
Worst resumes ever One time I had someone upload how to upload their resume from Dropbox instead of their resume.
Worst resumes ever The only time I have ever had to throw out a resume was because someone possibly had it in a bag with their lunch and the paper was soaking wet and dissolving as I tried to unfold it. It was just unacceptable to process. The application was left in a drop box so I don't know if it was a prank or an actual applicant.
Worst resumes ever l'Il usually still interview unless there is no relevant experience, but I've seen some atrocious resumes. I've seen people use crutchwords like "uh" in writing for a job description. I've also seen a sentence 4 lines long with zero punctuation. The same resume will have "attention to detail" as a skill set. I've interviewed for one of those resumes, and the applicant said "I dunno" to about 80% of my questions, and it turned out he didn't even know what job he applied for. It's not that I'm overly picky, but if someone can't spend the 20 minutes or less that it takes to proof read their resume, are they going to put alot of effort into their job? Maybe, but it's hard to
Worst resumes ever The responses make me hopeful for when I have to send in my CV
Worst resumes ever Back in 98 I asked a new group of hires at GIECO to write their email addresses on a list that was passed around. Remember email was kinda new back then.. One young female employee's email address included "mybaldcootchie".
Worst resumes ever I remember a meme or maybe a tv skit from awhile back. The hiring manager had a huge pile of resumes on his desk. Someone asked how he was going to sift through them all. He took 2/3rds of the pile, threw them in the trash, and remarked 'I don't hire unlucky people'. Lol.
Worst resumes ever It's been a long time but I used to do hiring for a cinema. Staff were often young, for many it was a first job, making popcorn and selling tickets type of gig. I would not pursue anything where parents came in with a CV for their teenager or if parents were contacting me on behalf of their teen. Big red flag. Either their kid didn't want he job in the first place or they're incapable of taking initiative and it doesn't bode well for how they'd be as an employee.
Worst resumes ever Not me, but my prior construction superintendent threw away three immigrant's applications for supposedly all using the same SSN.
Worst resumes ever This doesn't matter 100% of the time but bad formatting. If it's hard to read I probably won't read it.
Worst resumes ever At a past job, they were looking for truck drivers. My best friends dad applied, his email address had pantydropper in
Worst resumes ever Not me, but a friend who checks resumes/CVs had a belter. Candidate had a conviction for "common asslot" and his reference was his friend "Baz".
Worst resumes ever Reading through this thread I see why people lie on resumes and have someone write their resume for them. Even in federal hiring, selecting "I'm an expert in this subject" in all fields of the suitability questions is the only way your application gets past the filter.
Worst resumes ever If it's a professional position, significant spelling errors will make me pass on a resume. If it's a warehouse job or something, I'm less concerned.

 

And as we wrap up this journey through the land of employment blunders, remember this: those 38 resumes are just a drop in the ocean of the world's workplace woes. If you're eager for more career-based chuckles that make you grateful you at least have a job, dive headfirst into the abyss of job interview mishaps, awkward CV fails, and the black hole of funny office blunders. Because let's face it, the world of employment misadventures? It's a bottomless pit of laughter that keeps on giving, even if it's at the expense of someone else's job prospects.

Roy

Roy R., Chief Meme Curator Roy founded Thunder Dungeon in 2012 and has since guided its growth into a 2.5 million‑strong community of meme enthusiasts. With over a decade of digital‑media experience and a nose for viral humor, Roy oversees content strategy, ensuring every post is both hilarious and high‑quality

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